201+ School Jokes for Kids

Last Updated on September 10, 2024 by Tomi James

School can be fun, but nothing makes it better than a good laugh! Whether it’s math class, history, or just hanging out with friends, these school jokes for kids are sure to put a smile on every kid’s face. From playful puns to silly one-liners, we’ve gathered 201+ school jokes that will get students and teachers laughing all day long! 🎒

Funny Math Jokes for Kids

  • Why was the math book always sad? Because it had too many problems! 😢
  • Why don’t calculators make good friends? They can be a little too calculating. 🤖
  • What’s a math teacher’s favorite place? Times Square! 🧮
  • Why did the two fours skip lunch? They already eight! 🍽️
  • Why was the obtuse angle always so sad? Because it was never right. 😭
  • What’s the king of the pencil case? The ruler! 👑
  • Why was six scared of seven? Because seven eight nine! 😨
  • What did zero say to eight? Nice belt! 👖
  • Why did the student do multiplication on the floor? Because the teacher told him not to use tables. 🪑
  • What did the triangle say to the circle? You’re pointless! 🔺
  • Why are ghosts bad at math? They always disappear. 👻
  • Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot! 👃
  • Why did the student bring a ladder to math class? To reach the high numbers. 📐
  • What’s the secret to doing math? Just add some patience. ➕
  • Why do plants hate math? Because it gives them square roots! 🌱
  • How do you make seven even? Take away the “s”! ✂️
  • Why is math like ice cream? It has a lot of problems, but it’s always cool! 🍦
  • Why don’t numbers ever get sick? Because they always count on each other! 🧮
  • Why did the angle break up with the triangle? It found someone more acute. 😍
  • What’s the favorite dessert of mathematicians? Pi! 🥧

Hilarious Science Jokes for Students

Hilarious Science Jokes for Students
  • Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything! 🤯
  • Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter! ☀️
  • What’s a scientist’s favorite dog? A lab! 🐕‍🔬
  • How do you organize a space party? You planet! 🪐
  • Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions! 🧪
  • Why did the mushroom go to the party alone? Because he’s a fungi! 🍄
  • How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experiments! 🧬
  • What did the volcano say to its partner? I lava you! 🌋
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts! 🦴
  • Why did the physics teacher break up with biology? There was no chemistry. 💔
  • Why is the ocean so salty? Because the land never waves back! 🌊
  • Why can’t you trust a microbiologist? Because they’re always up to something small. 🧫
  • What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder. 🧑‍🎓
  • Why don’t you ever tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes, and the corn has ears. 🌽
  • How do you know the moon is broke? It’s down to its last quarter. 🌕
  • Why did the wind break up with the sky? It found someone else to blow around! 💨
  • Why do bees have sticky hair? They use honeycombs. 🍯
  • How do scientists greet each other? With high “fives”! 🖐️
  • Why did the cell go to school? It wanted to be a “mitochondrion”! 🦠
  • What did the biologist wear to impress their crush? Designer genes! 👖

Silly English Jokes for Class

  • Why did the comma break up with the sentence? It felt too “punctuated”. 🤓
  • What’s an English teacher’s favorite drink? Tease! 🫖
  • Why did the adjective cry? It found out it wasn’t very descriptive. 😢
  • Why don’t writers ever win races? Because they always need a break! 🏁
  • What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus! 📚
  • Why did the writer bring a pencil to the party? To draw attention! ✏️
  • Why are books so warm? Because they have so many “pages” to turn. 📖
  • Why don’t periods ever argue? Because they always make a point. 🛑
  • Why was the sentence arrested? It was a run-on! 🏃
  • How do poets say goodbye? With a verse and a rhyme! 🎤
  • Why can’t you trust spellcheck? Because it never “counts” on you! 🤖
  • Why was the dictionary always working? Because it was full of definitions. 📖
  • Why is the alphabet so clever? Because it has a lot of letters to work with! 🔤
  • Why don’t commas ever argue? They always pause to listen! 🛑
  • How does an essay end its day? With a conclusion! 📝
  • Why did the capital letter start running? It was chasing a sentence! 💨
  • Why are words bad at dancing? They always get mixed up! 🩰
  • How does a teacher organize a class? With perfect grammar-tude! 😎
  • Why was the vowel always complaining? It never got enough consonants! 🔠
  • How do you compliment a punctuation mark? Tell it “You’ve got great points!” ❗
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Playful History Jokes for Children

  • Why did the history book look so sad? It had too many dates! 😢
  • Why was the mummy so good at keeping secrets? It was all wrapped up! 🧻
  • What did the Statue of Liberty say after a joke? I crack myself up! 🗽
  • Why did the student bring a ladder to history class? To reach high points in the past! 📜
  • Who’s the biggest prankster in history? The court jester! 🤡
  • Why was the Roman Empire so strong? It had great Caesar salad! 🥗
  • What’s Alexander the Great’s favorite type of pizza? A Greek pizza! 🍕
  • Why did the knight bring a pencil to battle? To draw his sword! 🗡️
  • Why were the early humans always at the top of the class? They invented everything first! 🛠️
  • What’s Napoleon’s favorite vegetable? Bon-apart! 🥕
  • Why didn’t the Pharaoh go to school? Because he was already the ruler! 👑
  • What do you call a pirate’s historical journey? His-story! 🏴‍☠️
  • Why was the history class so noisy? They couldn’t stop reenacting the past! 🎭
  • Why did Cleopatra refuse dessert? She said it was too rich! 🍰
  • What do you call George Washington’s false teeth? Presidentures! 🦷
  • Why couldn’t the Revolutionary War ever relax? It was always on edge! ⚔️
  • What do you call an argument between historians? A past-tension. 😆
  • Why did the caveman go to school? To improve his cave-art skills! 🖼️
  • What’s the best way to talk to a king? In royal terms! 🏰
  • Why did the ancient Egyptians love cats? Because they always purr-fected history! 🐱

School Lunch Jokes to Enjoy

  • Why did the tomato turn red at lunch? Because it saw the salad dressing! 🍅
  • What did the sandwich say to the bread? You’re the best thing since sliced bread! 🍞
  • Why don’t bananas ever get lonely at lunch? They hang out in bunches! 🍌
  • Why did the cookie go to the principal’s office? It was feeling crummy! 🍪
  • Why don’t eggs tell jokes at lunch? They might crack up! 🥚
  • What’s the favorite lunch of all music teachers? Sandwich with lots of “notes”! 🎶
  • Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice! 🍎
  • What did the pizza say to the topping? You’re supreme! 🍕
  • Why did the cheese fail school? Because it couldn’t stay sharp! 🧀
  • What’s a hamburger’s favorite day of the week? Fry-day! 🍔
  • Why did the grapes never fight? They were in bunches together! 🍇
  • What’s the best part of eating lunch at school? The recess pieces! 🍫
  • Why don’t hotdogs ever tell jokes? Because they always get grilled! 🌭
  • What do you call a sleepy sandwich? A snooze-wich! 💤
  • Why did the salad go to school? Because it wanted to get tossed around! 🥗
  • What’s the best thing to drink during lunch? A school of thought… er, water! 💧
  • Why do oranges make good friends? Because they always peel good! 🍊
  • What’s a hamburger’s least favorite subject? The grill! 😬
  • Why do donuts always have such sweet dreams? Because they’re full of holes! 🍩

Back-to-School Jokes to Start the Year

  • Why did the computer bring a pencil to school? To draw up some ideas! 🖥️
  • What did the pencil say on the first day of school? I’m feeling sharp! ✏️
  • Why was the eraser so confident on the first day? It knew it could fix any mistake! 🩹
  • Why don’t school buses ever get in trouble? They always follow the rules! 🚌
  • What do you say when you lose your pencil on the first day? That’s pointless! 😅
  • Why was the glue so excited to start school? It knew it would stick around! 🖇️
  • Why was the first day of school always so tiring? Because students had to catch up! 🍅
  • Why was the ruler excited about the first day? It knew it would measure up! 📏
  • What’s the sharpest thing in school? The first day’s pencils! ✏️
  • Why did the student bring string to school? To tie up loose ends! 🧵
  • Why was the chalkboard always busy? It was full of “write” ideas! 🖊️
  • What’s a teacher’s favorite time of year? Back-to-school season, because they love class acts! 🎓
  • Why was the clock always excited for school? It was ready to “tick” through the lessons! ⏰
  • What did the paper say to the pencil? Write on! 📝
  • Why are school desks such good listeners? Because they always stay in place! 🪑
  • Why did the backpack feel important? Because it was holding all the class essentials! 🎒
  • What’s a school principal’s favorite game? Follow the leader! 👨‍🏫
  • Why do students like the first week of school? Because it’s filled with a lot of new beginnings! 🎉
  • Why are teachers great comedians? Because they always know how to crack up the class! 😆
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Teacher Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Teacher Jokes That Will Make You Laugh
  • Why did the teacher wear sunglasses in class? Because her students were so bright! 😎
  • What did the science teacher say when she found a joke in class? It’s elemental! 🔬
  • Why did the teacher go to school with a ladder? To reach new heights! 🪜
  • What’s a teacher’s favorite nation? Expla-nation! 🌍
  • Why was the teacher’s book always so funny? It was filled with class acts! 📚
  • What did the teacher say to the pencil? You’re on point! ✏️
  • Why did the teacher love writing on the chalkboard? It always had her full attention! 🖊️
  • What did the teacher do after class? She graded the papers! 📄
  • Why did the gym teacher always bring a pencil to class? For a draw! 🏃
  • Why are teachers great at jokes? Because they always “school” everyone in laughter! 😂
  • What’s a teacher’s favorite type of music? Class-ical! 🎶
  • Why don’t teachers ever get lost? They always have a plan! 📋
  • Why was the teacher always so good at history? She had all the answers written down! 📜
  • What’s a teacher’s favorite candy? Smarties! 🍬
  • Why do teachers love testing their students? They love a good challenge! 📝
  • What’s a teacher’s favorite drink? Scholar soda! 🥤
  • Why did the teacher bring a book to the gym? She wanted to read between the lines! 📖
  • Why did the teacher bring extra chalk to class? Because she wanted to make a good point! ✍️
  • Why was the math teacher so well-dressed? She loved to “count” on looking sharp! 👗

Math Jokes That Add Up to Fun

  • Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems! 📘
  • Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9! 😄
  • What’s a math teacher’s favorite dessert? Pi! 🥧
  • Why did the student do multiplication on the floor? Because the teacher told them not to use tables! 😂
  • What did zero say to eight? Nice belt! 🔢
  • Why was the number 7 always so lucky? Because it was in prime position! 🎲
  • What’s the best tool for math class? A multi-purpose calculator! 🔢
  • Why did the fraction always argue with the decimal? It couldn’t decide who was more “pointed”! 🎯
  • What’s the sharpest object in math class? The student’s pencils and wits! ✏️
  • Why did the math student eat their homework? Because they said it was a piece of cake! 🍰
  • Why don’t you ever argue with a 90-degree angle? It’s always right! 📐
  • What’s a math teacher’s favorite movie? The Sum of All Fears! 🎥
  • Why was the triangle so good at stand-up comedy? It had three great points! 🔺
  • What did the student say when asked about geometry? I think I’ve got it all figured out! 📏
  • Why was the equal sign so humble? It knew it wasn’t less than or greater than anyone else! ➗
  • Why don’t math students ever get lost? They always follow the coordinates! 🗺️
  • What did one calculator say to the other? You can count on me! 🔢
  • Why did the student wear glasses in math class? To improve division! 👓
  • What’s a math student’s favorite place to relax? In an acute angle! 🔺
  • Why did the math teacher love nature? Because they were always plotting graphs! 🌳

English Class Jokes to Spell Out the Fun

  • Why was the grammar book always tired? It had too many commas to pause! 💤
  • Why do writers never get cold? They always have a draft! 📝
  • Why did the letter bring an umbrella? In case there were spelling showers! ☔
  • What did the exclamation mark say to the question mark? You’re so full of questions! ❓
  • Why don’t words ever argue? Because they always make a point! 🖊️
  • Why are commas such good friends? They always pause to listen! 🛑
  • What did the capital letter say to the lowercase? You need to stand tall! 🅰️
  • Why was the dictionary always so wise? It knew the meaning of everything! 📚
  • Why did the sentence bring a pencil? It needed to draw some attention! ✏️
  • Why was the paragraph so strong? It had great structure! 🏗️
  • What do English teachers love to do at lunch? Read between the lines! 📖
  • Why did the alphabet go to the party? Because it knew all the letters were invited! 🎉
  • Why don’t adjectives ever fight? They always describe the situation clearly! 🗣️
  • What’s an English teacher’s favorite music? Anything with a strong verse! 🎶
  • Why do writers always win arguments? They have a way with words! 🖋️
  • Why did the writer cross the road? To put some thought into it! 🛣️
  • What did the student say when they aced the spelling test? I’m the “word” champ! 🏆
  • Why do sentences always bring extra periods? Just in case they need to stop! 🛑
  • What’s an English teacher’s favorite snack? A good story! 🍿
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Recess Jokes for Kids Who Love to Play

  • Why was the basketball so good at school? Because it had bounce-back! 🏀
  • Why did the playground bring a pencil? To draw out all the fun! ✏️
  • Why was the slide always so happy? Because it was on a roll! 🎢
  • Why did the swings always get the highest grades? They knew how to go up and down with ease! 🎠
  • What do you call a bear at recess? A teddy-bounce! 🧸
  • Why was the jungle gym so confident? It was built to climb any obstacle! 🧗
  • Why did the kid bring a rope to recess? To jump into fun! 🤸
  • Why was the seesaw always in a good mood? It loved balancing the fun! ⚖️
  • What did the ball say to the playground? Let’s bounce outta here! ⚽
  • Why was recess always the best subject? Because it was a break from the usual! 😎
  • What’s a teacher’s favorite part of recess? Watching the students have a ball! 🎉
  • Why did the hopscotch game always win? Because it was always on point! 🔢
  • What’s the hardest thing about recess? Coming back inside! 🏃
  • Why did the student run around the playground twice? Because they wanted to jog their memory! 🧠
  • Why do kids love the monkey bars? Because they like to swing into action! 🐒
  • What’s a kid’s favorite activity at recess? Catching up with fun! 🏃‍♂️
  • Why don’t playgrounds ever get lonely? They’re always filled with friends! 👫
  • What’s the most popular game during recess? Hide and seek, because everyone’s looking for fun! 🤫
  • Why do students never forget recess? Because it’s the most playful subject! 🎉

Library Jokes to Book Your Laughter

  • Why did the librarian always win hide and seek? She was good at being quiet! 🤫
  • Why don’t libraries ever get messy? Because they have all the books in order! 📚
  • What did the book say to the librarian? I’m ready to turn the page! 📖
  • Why did the librarian get promoted? Because she had all the right volumes! 📙
  • Why don’t books ever get cold? They have great covers! 📕
  • What’s a librarian’s favorite snack? Bookworms! 🪱
  • Why did the book go to therapy? It had too many issues! 📘
  • Why did the student bring a book to the gym? To strengthen their vocabulary! 💪
  • What’s a book’s favorite subject? Reading, of course! 📚
  • Why did the mystery novel get a medal? It had a plot twist! 🎖️
  • What did the book say to the shelf? Thanks for the support! 🛠️
  • Why do books never argue? They always turn the page! 📖
  • Why are books always good at keeping secrets? Because they’re bound to stay quiet! 🤐
  • What’s the librarian’s favorite day of the year? Book Return Day! 🗓️
  • Why don’t students sleep in the library? Because there are so many stories to keep them awake! 😴
  • Why did the student check out so many books? They wanted to read between the lines! 📖
  • Why did the book feel lonely? It hadn’t been checked out in a while! 📕
  • What’s the best thing about reading in the library? It’s a page-turner every time! 📖
  • Why did the library hire a detective? To investigate overdue books! 🕵️‍♂️

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