201+ Witch Puns & Jokes to Cast a Spell on You

Last Updated on November 6, 2024 by Tomi James

Casting a spell of laughter! Enjoy the funniest witch puns & jokes—perfect for Halloween fans and anyone who loves a magical laugh! From spells gone hilariously wrong to broomstick antics, this collection of 201+ witch puns and jokes is here to bring out your inner cackle.

Perfect for sharing at Halloween parties, during spooky season, or anytime you need a wicked laugh, these jokes will cast a spell of giggles on everyone. So grab your pointy hat and let the magic of laughter begin!

Witchy Wisdom for a Wicked Laugh 😂

  • Why don’t witches wear flat shoes? Because they love high spirits! 🧙‍♀️
  • What’s a witch’s favorite school subject? Spell-ing! 📚
  • Why did the witch take a broom to bed? She didn’t want to sweep her dreams away. 🌙
  • How do you know if a witch is good at her job? She always spells success. 🌟
  • Why are witches so good at baseball? They know how to throw a wicked curveball! ⚾
  • How do witches keep their hair so perfect? Scare spray, of course! 💇‍♀️
  • What do you call a witch’s garage? Her broom closet! 🚪
  • Why was the witch such a great cook? She added just the right amount of eye of newt! 🧅
  • What do you get when you cross a witch and a snowman? Frost-bite! ⛄
  • Why did the witch open a bakery? Because she had a knead for dough! 🥖
  • How do witches stay in shape? They scream-aerobics! 🏋️‍♀️
  • What’s a witch’s favorite instrument? A moog synthesizer! 🎹
  • Why did the witch get promoted? She was spell-binding in her work! 💼
  • How do witches get around? They always take the scenic broom! 🧹
  • Why did the witch get a pet spider? She needed a web designer! 🕸️
  • How do you find a witch on the beach? Look for her sand-witch! 🥪
  • Why don’t witches use email? They prefer spell mail! ✉️
  • What kind of books do witches read? Ones with a spell-binding plot! 📖
  • Why did the witch laugh during the test? Because she knew she’d aced it with flying brooms! ✏️

Spooky Spellbinding One-Liners 🧪

  • What’s a witch’s favorite potion ingredient? A splash of giggle water! 🍹
  • How did the witch get so popular? Her spells went viral! 🌐
  • Why did the witch put her money in the cauldron? She was investing in potions and dividends! 🤑
  • How do witches send messages? With a spell-o-gram! 📜
  • Why do witches make terrible detectives? They always jump to con-cauldron-sions! 🔍
  • What’s a witch’s favorite social media app? Witch-tok! 📱
  • Why did the witch go to the gym? She wanted to stay broomin’ with confidence! 🏃‍♀️
  • How do you make a witch scratch her head? Say, “You missed a spot in your potion!” 🤔
  • What’s a witch’s go-to snack? Hex-mix! 🍿
  • How do you invite a witch to a party? Send her an enchanting-evite! 🎉
  • Why did the witch turn her broom into a car? She wanted witchcraft with horsepower! 🚗
  • What’s a witch’s favorite kind of candy? Twix or Treats! 🍬
  • Why are witches always calm? They’re used to spell-binding situations. 🧘‍♀️
  • How do witches text each other? They use cauldron emojis! 📲
  • Why don’t witches play board games? They hate getting hexed out! 🎲
  • What does a witch call her bestie? Her ghoul-friend! 👻
  • Why do witches avoid dating mummies? They say it’s too much wrap drama! 🧻
  • How do witches order their coffee? With a dash of eye-opener! ☕
  • What do witches do on weekends? They throw ghoul parties! 🎃
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Hex-cellent Halloween Humor 🎃

  • Why did the witch break up with the warlock? He kept ghosting her! 👻
  • How does a witch clean her house? Broom service, naturally! 🧼
  • Why don’t witches go to the beach? They’re afraid of sand traps! 🏖️
  • How do you cheer up a sad witch? With a hextra funny joke! 😄
  • What’s a witch’s favorite clothing store? Cauldron & Barrel! 🛒
  • Why did the witch put a spell on her shoes? She wanted a little extra charm! 👠
  • How does a witch pay her bills? In potion currency! 💰
  • Why did the witch wear sunglasses? Her future was spellbindingly bright! 😎
  • How do witches catch the bus? They stick out their thumbs and fly! 🚌
  • What’s a witch’s favorite music genre? Hex-hop! 🎶
  • Why don’t witches play hide and seek? They’re always witch-spotted! 🌕
  • How did the witch decorate her house? With bewitching decor! 🕯️
  • Why do witches keep extra brooms? For their sweepstakes! 🎁
  • What did the witch say to her cauldron? “You boil me over!” 🥘
  • How does a witch answer the phone? “Spell-o?” 📞
  • Why did the witch join a sports team? She wanted to broom with the best! 🏆
  • What’s a witch’s favorite part of a joke? The punch-spell! 💥
  • Why did the witch get detention? She kept spelling trouble! 🏫
  • What does a witch say when she lifts her broom? “Up and away!” 🧹

Cauldron-Cooked Chuckles 🥣

  • What did the witch say when her cauldron boiled over? “Witch please!” 💁‍♀️
  • How does a witch save money? She coupons her potions! 💸
  • What’s a witch’s least favorite chore? Witch-washing! 🧽
  • How do witches improve their magic? Potion practice! 🧪
  • Why did the witch bring a ladder to the spell party? She wanted to reach new heights! 🪜
  • What did the witch cook for dinner? Bat-tered wings! 🍗
  • How did the witch get to work? She broompooled! 🚗
  • What’s a witch’s favorite game? Spellbound! 🎮
  • Why did the witch wear a disguise? To keep her identity under wraps! 👀
  • How do witches keep their secrets? They bottle them up! 🍾
  • Why was the witch late for class? She got caught up in a spell! 🧙‍♀️
  • Why don’t witches ride roller coasters? They already have enough twists and turns! 🎢
  • What did the witch say when she finished her potion? “Done and brewed!” 🍵
  • Why do witches avoid debates? They hate spelling out their points. 📢
  • What’s a witch’s favorite pizza topping? Eye of anchovy! 🍕
  • How did the witch perform at karaoke? Spell-bindingly! 🎤
  • Why did the witch bring an umbrella? She heard it might spell rain! ☔
  • What do witches say at the end of a long day? “Time to broom out!” 🛏️
  • How did the witch win the talent show? With a magical performance! 🎭
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Funny Witch Puns for Instagram Captions ✨

  • “Witch better have my candy!” 🍬
  • “Too cute to spook!” 👻
  • “Resting witch face activated.” 😏
  • “Broom hair, don’t care.” 🧹
  • “You say witch like it’s a bad thing.” 😜
  • “Feeling witchy and stitchy.” 🧙‍♀️🪡
  • “Flew in on my broom, now I’m here for the boos!” 🍻
  • “Which witch is which?” 🧙‍♀️
  • “Witch, please!” 💁‍♀️
  • “Yes, I can drive stick!” 🧹
  • “Putting a spell on your feed.”
  • “Living my broom life.” 🧹
  • “If the broom fits, ride it.” 🧙‍♀️
  • “In my spooky era.” 🖤
  • “Just brewing up some trouble.” 🧪
  • “Witching you a spook-tacular day!” 🎃
  • “Feeling magical and slightly batty.” 🦇
  • “Charmed, I’m sure.”
  • “Double, double, toil and selfie!” 📸
  • “I put a spell on you (and your feed).” 🧙‍♀️✨

Funny Witch Puns One-Liners 🧙‍♀️

  • “Witch way to the candy?” 🍬
  • “Spellbound and fabulous.” 💁‍♀️
  • “Here to brew up some mischief.” 🧪
  • “Feeling fab-boo-lous.” 👻
  • “Just a witch, living her best broom life.” 🧹
  • “No one gets in my cauldron without permission!” 🥣
  • “Fangs for asking; I’m bewitching tonight.” 🧛‍♀️
  • “Hocus pocus and a lot of focus!”
  • “Got my broomstick and my game face on!” 😏
  • “Making magic happen, one spell at a time.” 🧪
  • “Witching you a magical day.” 🎃
  • “Feeling un-BOO-lievably magical.” 👻
  • “I’m only wicked on weekends.” 😜
  • “Charmed, I’m spellbound!” 🌟
  • “This witch runs on pumpkin spice.” 🎃
  • “Witch better have my coffee.”
  • “Just a little witchy banter.” 🧙‍♀️
  • “Get in, loser—we’re going hexing.” 🧹
  • “Why did the witch break up with her broom? Because it swept her off her feet!” 😆
  • “Feeling bewitchingly fabulous!” 💃✨
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Fun Facts About Witch Puns 🎃

  • “Did you know? Witches don’t need GPS. They always know witch way to go!” 🧭
  • “Fun fact: Witch hats were originally made to keep out the rain!” 🌧️
  • “Historically, black cats were thought to protect witches from evil spirits.” 🐈‍⬛
  • “It’s not a bug; witches actually prefer cauldrons over pots!” 🥣
  • “Brooms were used in ancient times to clean out negative energy!” 🧹
  • “‘Hocus Pocus’ actually means ‘hoax’ or ‘joke’ in Latin!” 🎩
  • “Witchy humor has been around since the Middle Ages!” 🧙‍♀️
  • “In folklore, witches used lavender in potions for good dreams.” 💜
  • “Some witches’ brooms are made from hawthorn wood—thought to attract fairies!” 🧚‍♀️
  • “Witches love cats because they’re independent and stealthy.” 🐱
  • “In medieval times, people thought witches caused storms!” 🌧️⚡
  • “‘Double, double, toil and trouble’ comes from Shakespeare’s Macbeth.” 📜
  • “The moon is a symbol of magic in many cultures.” 🌕
  • “Did you know? Owls are also considered magical companions to witches!” 🦉
  • “Witches have used candles for spell-casting since ancient Egypt!” 🕯️
  • “Orange and black are traditional Halloween colors for witches.” 🎃
  • “The word ‘witch’ comes from the Old English ‘wicce,’ meaning wise woman.” 📜
  • “Witches are big fans of autumn because of all the natural ingredients for potions!” 🍂
  • “In some legends, witches wear red socks for good luck!” 🧦

Cat Witch Puns 🐈‍⬛

  • “Purr-fectly spellbound!” 🧙‍♀️🐾
  • “You’re the cat’s meow-gi-cal spell!” 🧶✨
  • “I’m feline witchy today!” 🐈‍⬛
  • “Every witch needs a purr-sonal assistant.” 🐾
  • “If cats could brew potions, they’d be purr-petrators!” 😼
  • “You’re the purr-fect addition to my spell.”
  • “Feeling witchy and whiskery.” 🧙‍♀️🐱
  • “What’s a witch’s favorite pet? A purr-caster!” 🐾
  • “It’s a hiss-terical night for spellcasting.” 🐈‍⬛
  • “Witch cats say ‘meowgical’ instead of magical!” 🪄
  • “Pawsitively spellbound by this kitty.” 🧙‍♀️🐾
  • “Every witch needs a black cat—it’s purr-ecautionary!” 🐾
  • “Spell-cats know how to keep secrets.” 🧙‍♀️🐈
  • “Purr-chanted to meet you!” 😸
  • “Witches and cats—they’re hiss-terically good together!” 🐈‍⬛
  • “Casting spells is easier with a feline assistant.” ✨🐱
  • “Got my cat-titude and my spell book ready!” 🐾
  • “What do you call a witch’s feline friend? A fur-tune teller!” 🔮🐾
  • “This cat’s got me spellbound!” 😻
  • “Feeling hiss-terical and magical.” 🐱✨

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